Masters- chug chug chugging along….


This masters dissertation is currently DOING MY HEAD IN.

So I felt a quick offload in my blog might help me refocus and get back into the zone with it.

I started this masters in Sexual Health back in Sept 2006. Yes SEVEN YEARS AGO. YES IT IS THE LONGEST MASTERS IN THE WORLD EVER.

At the time I was looking for a way to get a qualification in sexual health to further my planned career in Sexual Health (at the time I started my masters I was an NQT teaching half science and half PSHE & Citizenship).  I got my PGDip in Sexual Health in 2009 (2/3rds of the masters whilst also working fulltime)  I think, and then I had two maternity leaves and now finally embarking on the dissertation to finish the whole thing off and get my masters in sexual health.

Trouble is 7 years later I am exactly where I wanted to be careerwise- I have my dream job working freelance for some incredible organisations and I now I am at a point where I don’t feel I need the masters qualification to help my career as I no longer necessarily think it will. My motivation for completing the masters has shifted as a result. In 2012 my dad died when my littlest child was only a few weeks old. He was the one who was very keen on me doing a masters and encouraged me all the time to stick with it.  The main reason I am is for his memory- finishing it would have made him so proud. Of course that means there are is all sorts of grief stuff tied up in completing this masters- but heck it gives me stuff to rant about in the reflective chapter.

Finally the most frustrating aspect of this process is I know I have no chance of doing very well in this masters. I currently hold ~75credits at distinction level and ~45credits at pass level. Which would be brilliant and might mean I was inline for at least a merit overall if it wasn’t for the fact I did 60 of my distinction level credits at a different university (my PSHE Certification plus professional practice module) and bought them onto this masters, therefore the grade cannot be counted. So now I have 15credits at distinction and 45credits at pass level and given the way this masters is currently going I am unlikely to achieve anything higher than a pass overall. Being a complete overachieving perfectionist lunatic all this work just for a pass level just does not seem worth it at all.

So I have 5months left to finish this masters. I am behind by about a chapter. I’m tired, I’m stressed, feels like I’m barely seeing anyone (kids and husband included!) and I am wondering if it is worth it. 

But still I plug on. Because the most awesome relief I will feel on the 2nd of Jan (how mean for a submission date- will have to get it printed and bound before Christmas!) when I hand this fecker in will be immense, I’m half way through. I will get there. A pass is okay and I might scrape a merit (unlikely but attempting to be optimistic).  I can and will be so proud of myself for finishing it under very difficult circumstances.

Plus with all the rewrites of sections I am having to do when I get sidetracked into a rant and have to cut it out again is giving me some awesome poncy blog material complete with academic references- as rather than waste that typing I am posting it here.

So it’s not all bad.

 

Sort of.

 

Any tips, strategies, motivational boosts to get me through the next 5 months gratefully received and if you EVER hear me mention a PhD please just get me sectioned.

 

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One thought on “Masters- chug chug chugging along….

  1. You’re going to write something that no one has ever written before and that others can use to inform the things they write. That’s AMAZING, girl!

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