My masters is spanning a few areas within social, educational and health, and I thought it might be a worthwhile brain dump to try and map these in a venn diagram to try and map some of the issues with the aim of trying to make my thoughts more coherent and to identify a pathway through my research- possibly chapters or something. I’m being vague I know that is because I have literally only just spent 10mins scribbling a draft diagram (it is very rough and draft) and now I want to throw it out to you lot for dissection and discussion to help me clarify my thoughts and refine it.
Can anyone help? What is missing? What shouldn’t be there? What needs to be renamed? Is there a better way to map this?
What does the question “Should schools teach about porn?” conjure up to you? What if I missed the “about”? Should schools teach porn? Are you now worrying sex education is going a bit Monty Python but with pneumatic breasts, no pubic hair and enormous penises!? (N.B. Despite the misleading headlines watching porn with students is absolutely not an option- it would be entirely inappropriate and possibly illegal)
The media has taken the first edition of the Sex Educational Supplement (the new SEF magazine) and gone with some rather interesting headlines including
As a parent are you suddenly very alarmed by these headlines? Just what exactly do teachers want to cover with my precious innocent children? Is your gut reaction now NO WAY THAT IS NOT ON! SCHOOLS SHOULD ABSOLUTELY NOT TEACH ABOUT PORN.
My gut reaction to those headlines was to wince and sigh, because I’m a parent as well as a sex educator. I know that efforts to discuss porn with young people are aimed to provide a safe environment to discuss that porn isn’t necessarily a realistic depiction of sex,and that recognizes that young people can be exposed to very sexualised material from a young age and aims to help give them the tools to cope with growing up in a world where porn is only ever a few clicks away. We can try and shield them from it as much as we like but ultimately past a certain age that is going to be a futile endeavor and I want my children to recognize, expect and achieve consenual healthy relationships including sexual ones. I want them to be able to be critical of media messages about beauty, sex and sexuality, gender roles, and most of all I want them to be safe.
That is exactly what teaching about porn aims to do.
So in answer to the question Should Schools teach about porn?- ABSOLUTELY!*.
So please when confronted with headlines like these- take a little time and do some digging to what is really going on. After all, doing just that is Media Literacy 101 and exactly the type of things I want to be teaching my kids and yours. Here is another view and here is the exact resource blown out of all proportion.
Yours
SexEdUKation
*P.S There is a caveat to that- my expectation is that teachers delivering this material should be well trained and supported by their school community and appropriate educational materials. This topic is too important and too sensitive to get wrong. Not least if you don’t want your school to end up in the Daily Mail!
P.P.S A large part of this debate seems to stem around covering issues that are too sensitive and controversial and therefore should only be covered by parents. Which is all well and good in an ideal world where all parents feel equipped to have these conversations with their children, but in the real world where children and young people miss out on discussions around sex and relationships due to parental fears, embarrassment or lack of knowledge, then schools can have an important role to play.
As a parent I want my children to have a safe space in school to discuss some of these issues with someone other than me. I’d hope they’d talk to me but I also recognise and respect they may not want too. After all there is nothing more embarrassing than talking to your parents about anything to do with sex!
P.P.S *Update* Sex Education Forum have emailed a response to the media responses their network- pasted below for reference. Wholeheartedly agree with all of it:
1. Teachers have a duty to teach a broad and balanced curriculum and their personal views, for example about pornography should not come into it.
2. Good SRE promotes core values of respect, non-violence and care for each other and this extends to any discussion about pornography.
3. The reality is many young people have seen pornography as it’s very accessible but many have never had a safe, appropriate discussion about it facilitated by an adult.
4. Good teaching will encourage pupils to reflect on their values and attitudes and will allow them to be ‘critical consumers” of media with ‘filters in their heads’.
5. Teachers should make it absolutely clear what is illegal and that young people understand what consent is.
6. Teachers should be trained to teach SRE.
7. Pornography is not to be taught in isolation and the magazine shows that the scaffolding is core SRE themes: our bodies, relationships, gender, power, consent etc.
Thought it might be helpful to use my blog to jot some thoughts down about my masters and track my progress and just generally use it as a procrastination academic writing support tool. So here is my first post- just working on the aims and objectives section at the minute:
Aim: to perform a review of the evidence in the UK from the last 10 years (since the repeal of Section 28) to see how schools and teachers can effectively challenge homophobia
Objectives:
To critically explore the current context of homophobia and heteronormativity in British Schools.
To review the literature in a systematic way for evidence of successful strategies in addressing homophobia and heteronormativity.
To create an evidence based framework using the literature review, that has the potential to enable schools and teachers to adopt approaches to addressing homophobia and heternormativity.
The reason this is a subject of vital importance can be summarised in the following three quotes
The ideal:
‘Everyone is an insider, there are no outsiders – whatever their beliefs, whatever their colour, gender or sexuality.’ Archbishop Desmond Tutu, February 2004
The situation:
“Gay People are everywhere… except in the National Curriculum, and certainly not visible in our schools” Andrew (Quoted in Atkinson & De Palma, 2010)
The consequences of not changing the situation to meet the ideal:
“I want to kill all gays” Y9 boy in my PSHE Class before we started this work.
Pondering if my aims and objectives make sense (could be better) and if those quotes powerfully summarise why this work is important or actually a bit naff? Thoughts appreciated.
Next post will be looking at me defining terms – a minefield in itself!
Oh, science is awesome - there's so much to learn!
Just look at the colours when chemicals burn!
Then try this experiment; watch the effects:
Ask all of your teachers to talk about sex.
"Our bodies are wonderful: look what they do!
For all of those systems are what make up you!"
On breathing and eating, your class is instructive…
I am so sorry that this government thinks that a piece of guidance written in 2000 before Section 28 was repealed and before Civil Partnerships were bought in is still relevant today in 2013. This is a document which states “”It is not about the promotion of sexual orientation or sexual activity – this would be inappropriate teaching.” as well as expecting teachers to cover “the understanding of the importance of marriage for family life” with no mention of civil partnerships etc. It is a document that does not make adequate reference to homophobia, transphobia, gendered harrassment, sexting, FGM, Body image, self esteem, pornography, consent, sexual bullying, domestic violence despite these being issues that many schools are identifying as affecting their pupils and schools are desperate for support and guidance on these issues. I’m so sorry that they are getting it so wrong for you.
I’m sorry that this government ignores the voice of young people and I’m sorry that you may go to a school which doesn’t view PSHE as a vital subject essential to your future happiness and wellbeing simply because the government will not give the subject the status it deserves. (I am pleased however consent will be addressed as part of PSHE and I really hope that you will grow up happy, resilient, safe individuals however your PSHE education in school turns out.)
I hope with me as your mum you will turn out okay in these areas but likewise I am aware that as your mum in some ways I am not necessarily the best person to teach you, as you absolutely should have a right to learn about this stuff from someone other than a parent as you go grow older. As an adolescent particularly I want you to have access to impartial support and guidance and confidential medical services should you ever need. I will do my best to support any school you go to with their PSHE provsion, not just for your benefit but for your friend who might be gay, your friend who was assaulted, your friend with low self esteem, your friend who thinks they might be pregnant, your friend who is getting themselves into issues with substances, your friend who can’t cope.
For you, your friends, for all young people I will always fight for you to have the best PSHE Education I possibly can.
I love you.
Love Your Very Ranty and Currently Very Angry Mum typing furiously on her laptop whilst you are fast asleep.
This Wednesday night the PSHE Association are launching their first ever #PSHEChat on Twitter. The topic of the first chat will be “Putting the R into SRE”.
With this in mind when I was running a training in Gloucester on Friday and exploring relationships we looked at the key principles of relationships, trust, honesty, respect, communication, consent etc etc and chose which ones we wanted to explore in more details. Below are the ones we came up with
Following the webchat I will be doing a longer blogpost explaining some of the ideas above and cataloguing all the other ideas we came up with so I do hope you will join us Wednesday Night 7.30-8.30! #PSHEChat
Yesterday I spent the day training a lovely group of teachers. We had a great day but during the training a strange thing happened. I was talking about my experiences challenging homophobia in school in particular the privilege of being the first adult a young person came out too, and the impact that had had on her (and me), and suddenly I got all choked and teary and I struggled to regain my composure.
This has never happened before despite sharing these stories many times previously. Without meaning to sound like a sanctimonious pompous prat*, I think it suddenly dawned on me the incredibly important role I played in the wellbeing of that student, and how without me and the work I was trying to do, how differently things could have turned out for that student.
Teachers, never ever underestimate your power and importance in a students’ life. Please try use that power as a force for good. Be there when your students need you, challenge bullying and discrimination when you witness it. Your influence is so much more than achieving target grades. Never forget that.
*Which I do a bit. Sorry. Lecture over. Rants about artificial semen and the like will resume shortly.
When doing a condom demonstration I like to use an ejaculating condom demonstrator with UV sensitive fluid (artificial semen) and a blacklight to show that semen can still be present on the penis (and hands) even if they look clean post “ejaculation”. This highlights the need to be careful post coitally and not to get intimate again without clean hands/another condom etc, otherwise you maybe at risk of sexually transmitted diseases or unplanned pregnancy.
I recently ran out of my Health Edco UV sensitive Fluid and although it is £6.95 they have a minimum order charge of £20 plus its about £10 P&P so in order to try and save money I thought I would have a bash (no pun intended) at making my own. I do also have this non UV sensitive artificial semen but its very grittty (eh?! and Urgh!) and tends to go off after a year plus the lack of UV sensitivity ruins part of my demo, so I tend not to use it if I can.
A discussion on twitter on how to get UV sensitivity suggested laundry brightener and then just a white liquid soap or shampoo for the “semen”.
So you will need the following:
A clean jar (I just washed out my old jar of UV sensitive fluid). Some laundry brightener (about £3) and some white liquid soap (about 90p).
I filled the jar three quarters full of soap and stirred in half a sachet of laundry brightener.
Something very odd happened. The previously powdered laundry brightener clumped into hard solid lumps…..
and so far I have not been totally able to get rid of them. However the UV sensitivity is excellent!
I ended up adding the rest of the sachet of brightener and topped up the jar to full with the liquid soap.
The solution has oddly gone runnier than it was when the two things weren’t mixed- I thought it would go a bit thicker with a powder being added to a thick liquid, so I am pondering adding some cornflour to thicken it up! It also doesn’t have the slightly translucent quality that my previous jar of UV sensitive fluid (and real semen) does and to be honest it looks a smidge radioactive in the jar (tinge of fluorescent yellow/green)! Overall, I am reasonably pleased with the result even if its appearance isn’t as good as the Health Edco stuff, the UV sensitivity in my homemade stuff is far superior making this demo much more obvious when working with larger groups and since it is so much cheaper to make then I’m happy!
By the way real semen would probably glow under a black light but not to the vivid extent that my homemade artificial stuff does! My homemade artificial stuff also smells very strongly of soap and laundry unlike the real deal which many say smells like Bleach but heck its in the same genre of “cleaning fluid smells”. Ha!
I have enough liquid soap and sachets of brightener left to make up about 3 or 4 more batches (so £1 a batch instead of £20!) but as I only use 3-5ml at a time (the average ejaculation size) per demonstration, then I think this lot will last me a while so long as it doesn’t react/go off in the coming weeks. I will keep an eye and keep you posted.
Hope this post helps any cheapskate sex educators out there . If you would like a copy of my 25 page indepth guide to doing a condom demonstration with young people (or anyone over 13 really) then you can email me on sexedukation@gmail.com it costs £3.50 or is provided free on condom demonstration training courses I deliver, just contact me for more details.
Tonight I found myself briefly teaching my three year old, canine, incisors and molars and the difference between baby and adult teeth. Not because I am some insanely pushy mother but because she is always asking and wants to be able to name every part of her body and she can already name all the obvious ones and the less obvious ones (tonight she informed me “my throat is in my neck Mummy” and I don’t remember teaching her throat!)
Recently she has been very interested in nipples and the fact that males also have nipples but don’t have breasts, but she doesn’t have breasts but has nipples but she knows she isn’t a boy. She is aware boys have a penis and that she has a vulva and both have a bottom. She also knows that grown ups have pubic hair. None of this has ever fazed her and has been entirely led at her level when she asks a question (which she does all the time!) she gets an age appropriate response.
I was amused that I was teaching her year4 primary science curriculum in the new draft curriculum which mentions naming of body parts skilfully avoiding mentioning the genitals yet then goes on to specify the exact teeth (and digestive organs etc.) children should know. It also fails to make reference explicitly to puberty (although one might infer from the section on “life cycles”).
I’m a qualified science teacher married to an engineer so it’s a given the littlest Ukations are going to be science geeks, but tonight bought it home to me quite how badly the draft science curriculum doesn’t really meet children’s needs. They want to know what each part of their body does and what it is called. They want to know why their mummy has breasts, and how their baby sibling came into the world, they want to know the differences between boys and girls, why grown ups have hair where children don’t, why mummy sometimes bleeds. They want to know about why people get sick, about blood, vomit, poo and wee and why they need to wash their hands after going to the toilet. This can all be done age appropriately and at a level they can understand. It is basic human biology. Most parents will be happy with these conversations, others might not be/need more support to understand the aims of the lessons, some might need support to gain confidence in these conversations and that is okay and understandable, but I can’t seriously be the only parent who wants kids to be able to name penis/vulva (basic body parts) without shame or embarrassment before they can label a canine, incisor or a sodding molar (more advanced body parts)*!? Or am I!?
*P.S Sorry dear preschooler you may now be very bored in a Y4 science lesson 6years from now given that you know your teeth.
P.P.S Sorry future teacher of my child but I’m available for any SRE support you need
I have been solely freelance for the last three years now enabling me to work around my two tiny children who are both under three (previously I was part employed in a school and part freelance) . Although I was occasionally able to deliver sessions direct to young people and volunteer as a youth worker, I found I was really missing the school environment and developing those longer term relationships supporting young people to learn and succeed. So at the start of September I rejoined a secondary school for one day a week, I’m not teaching PSHE but a GCSE subject where I have two classes of Y11′s and I can honestly say its the best decision I have made in a long time. I am absolutely loving being back in a school, having fab new colleagues, and ace new students. The school is in special measures, the kids can be temperamental, my working day is 7.30am can be until 9pm (if I want to keep my school work to the one day) and I am only earning a tiny amount above my childcare costs but I really am absolutely thriving on the challenge and enjoying every second. I’m utterly knackered but heck teaching really is in my blood.
I love my job*
*I may revisit this post after the September back to school love rush has faded, the kids have missed their coursework deadlines and I’m behind on marking, report writing etc etc to see if I still feel the same! I hope so.
Ha!
. If you would like a copy of my 25 page indepth guide to doing a condom demonstration with young people (or anyone over 13 really) then you can email me on sexedukation@gmail.com it costs £3.50 or is provided free on condom demonstration training courses I deliver, just contact me for more details.
